Saturday, January 3, 2009

please.

do we write for comments?
i don't want to. i don't want to write for you anymore.
nothing against you.
i like you.
it's me i don't like.
my sin. my pride. my comfort. health wealth and prosperity. i have heard too much joel osteen and rod parsley today. elaina and i watch them and then yell things at the tv. i love wasting my time with her.
they make me crazy. honestly i get angry. like something inside of me is going to burst. how do people not see. is this message freeing to you? is this honestly the gospel your ears have longed to hear?
it's something in me that screams for comfort.
begs to be known. will plead and sob to be loved.
that's who i don't like.
i don't like the desire that owns me. that destroys me.
it's not you its me.
joel it might be you. it might be you i don't like. my question is, in your heart do you honestly see nothing wrong with the "gospel" you are preaching? i want to know the condition of your heart. i think you might not know that it's false. maybe you do. whatever.
jesus' blood never fails me.
tell me how the blood fixes this mess. the mess i daily find myself in. submersed in sin. i am inherently sinful. how is that washed? when do i feel clean? when is the weight of this broken sinful world going to lift. going to lift enough that i can breathe.



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